Fantasmatron

Fellow fomenters,

Halloween winding down here on Lee Road where the Friedmans may have been the hit of the block party — Karen with the pizza and wagon full of spiked hot cider, yours truly with an irrepressible blonde wig and body language that said, “Here to party.” I had trouble staying in character though when I immediately lost track of both kids while Karen had run back to the house for something. The wig was a bit unkempt and the fake hair was constantly in my mouth and eliminating my peripheral vision. “My BAY-bies!!!” I screamed, stumbling when a high heel hit the storm drain grate.

I’m kidding about the outfit. I’m pretty secure in my manhood but maybe not that secure to show up in drag to a block party. Today was about the kids.

Pre-Halloween in the powder room. Making eyes at Tom Brady.

Pre-Halloween in the powder room. Making eyes at Tom Brady.

But I must say I did enjoy the attention and honks from a passing truck as I walked the kids home from school on South Main Street, giant mass of blond hair flowing behind me. I worked from home today so I missed the dress-up activities at work — probably a good thing since I’m actually directing a project and supervising others now there. Best to at least appear managerial. I did welcome a new employee I’m supervising to the company with a box of animal crackers… so maybe that ship has sailed.

Trying my hand at fantasy football for the first time this year, having entered a league with some coworkers. I named my team the Sharon Blowfish, primarily because I had a funny picture of a blowfish saved on my computer (don’t you?) and to make it embarrassing for any team that lost to me in a weekly matchup. So far that strategy is paying off! After a rough start to season, I’ve strung together a couple wins over the two guys who take the league most seriously. Ah, the gloating emails… well just one so far. I don’t want to actually fear for my life. But this has really changed how I watch and enjoy football games, rooting for specific players more than the overall teams usually. I coined the term “fantasmic” for when two players on your team connect for a score, creating a huge jump in your fantasy team’s points. When they connect more than once in a game, well let’s just say you sleep well that night. No, actually, there’s almost always something going on in the late games affecting your game, so I have to resist the urge to check my phone app late at night to see what’s going on instead of getting much-needed sleep. Ah, but I see from the web metrics here that I lost everyone at the words “fantasy football.” Hello?

So as the penultimate frisbee season wound down, we played a bit of disc golf with the small group that still showed up after the start of the school year. We went once to the course at nearby Borderland State Park and there happened to be a disc golf tournament going on there that weekend. The grounds were dotted with various sportsmen, with many teams wearing matching polo-type athletic shirts tucked into their tight-fitting shorts and doing actual stretching and warm-up exercises. Apparently the sport has come some distance from the last time I crossed paths with some disc golfers, who looked more like appalachian trail hikers and left us in a not so subtle wake of pot smoke. But as borderline intimidating as the disc golf teams seemed at first as we tried to jump in on holes throughout the course, up close they were clearly the types who might be also into LARPing as their primary method of meeting women. Not many women in sight actually, playing disc golf. Except for Syd, who with her generous scoring handicap, ended up tied for first place. I came in dead last, finding more trees than chain baskets on the course that day.

Anyway, busy as ever on the home front with both kids taking piano lessons now, Syd doing soccer (finally a team sport!) and swimming on the weekends, and more and more homework to sort through at night with the kids. Syd turns nine in two weeks, which is fairly unbelievable. Halfway to her being off to college?? I’ll be going as well, just to keep her safe… and to re-enact Rodney Dangerfield’s timeless role in Back to School.

Hope you’re all doing well. Until next time, I’m yours rolling with four running backs into this weekend’s games (that requires some expert managing in your standard format Yahoo league… try to keep up, folks!),

Eric

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About ericf73

A modern-day combination of Noah, Godot and Clark W. Griswold.
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